The Hope of Times to Come by François Houle

Author:François Houle [Houle, François]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: women fiction, small town fiction, divorced fiction, family drama
ISBN: 9781989734063
Publisher: Dawn Rainbow Books
Published: 2022-03-16T04:00:00+00:00

FIFTEEN

_________

A shrill noise slices the quiet in the house and it takes me a few seconds to get my bearings since I’ve fallen asleep in my La-Z-Boy again. Seems to be a nightly thing now as I never feel like heading upstairs to my room too early. I know it’s loneliness that keeps me up way passed my bedtime but I can’t help it.

The house feels too big for me now.

Selling it isn’t something I’m thinking about. This is my home and it will just take a little bit of time to get used to being by myself. This is actually the first time in my life that I’m living alone and it feels strange. I need to find something to do with my time and I’m seriously considering getting a job of some sort to get me out into the world for a few hours each day. Or maybe I can volunteer at The Mission more often. I just need to find a purpose.

That too-loud beeping was my phone telling me I have a text so I reach for it and find the tight wariness in my face peel away.

It’s from Dorothy.

I read it several times and can’t believe how relieved I am that she got back to me. It doesn’t say much, no let’s get together or let’s keep in touch, but hearing from her makes me feel like a thirteen-year-old boy, but not just any thirteen-year-old boy. I feel like the thirteen-year-old boy I was who had just fallen for the prettiest girl he’d ever known.

A sigh escapes me and then reality settles tightly. We are not thirteen years old anymore and we both have lives. I know nothing of hers and mine hasn’t been the fairy tale I’d hoped.

I do wonder what her getting back to me means.

Probably nothing.

Just being friendly and polite. We’ll exchange a few messages, probably light on the real events of our past, and then go on with the rest of our separate lives.

I pull myself up from the La-Z-Boy, stretch, go through my nightly ritual of turning off the lights and checking that the doors are locked, and head off to bed.

Maybe I should really get a dog. The thought has popped into my head a few times now but by the time I finish brushing my teeth and get under the sheets, I’ve almost convinced myself that the last thing I need is a dog to take care of. I just need to learn to be by myself, to learn to make friends with the ghosts that haunt me.

Or I could get a puppy, some ridiculously happy little guy who’ll drive me crazy getting into trouble and will make me swear under my breath and question my decision, but a little fellow who’ll suck the loneliness out of me and honestly, will bring purpose to my life. I realize that I love caring for others, that I miss caring for Marie and in a way, I also cared for Sammy,

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